The One Thing That Cannot be Taken

     As I was cleaning the house one day, I was talking with the Lord.  I was frustrated about some things that seemed to go south.  Then that led me to complain about some dreams that I had that seem to fizzle out.  I was frustrated about things that seemed to be  . . . taken.  Or it felt that way at least.  What was going on?  Then, that all too familiar whisper echoed deep within my spirit. 

                   “Mary chose the good part, and it will NOT be taken from her.” (Read Luke 10:38-42)

              Ohhhh.   I realized there were so many things that could be taken from me, so many things from this life which can be taken.  Jobs can be lost.  Relationships can give out.  Dreams can be lost.  Reputations can be smeared.  Money can be drained.  Even ministries can end.  Our bodies even are decaying as we speak (so encouraging, I know).  And time is a thief. 

            But there is ONE incredible thing God himself says cannot be taken away from us.  In the midst of my complaint, I felt RELIEF.  There was one thing I could invest in that no one could touch!  There was something, if I gave it time and attention, nothing could steal!  What a stunning and beautiful promise Jesus gave to Mary that day.  I can’t imagine the conversations between Martha and Mary after this dialogue with their beloved Master.   Or maybe there was just awkward silence.   I can’t imagine the feelings Martha felt at hearing her precious Lord’s words about her sister. 

                                      There is NOTHING that can steal the time we invest sitting at His feet. Jesus says  It can never be taken away.  And, we will see the most warfare trying to distract us from that place.  I know this all too well as a mom.

Martha did too . . .

          There are constant dirty dishes in the sink.  There is an unending flow of laundry.  The bathrooms are cleaned, but then I turn around and the toilet . . .

          Then there are the needs of our kids . . . endless needs.  These precious gifts require massive amounts of love, patience and sacrifice. 

                                            If it’s not one thing, it’s another.

             Why does it seem like there is so much in the way of us establishing this precious practice in our lives?  Why does it seem like all of hell wants to keep us from this place of prayer, hearing the Lord’s heart? 

          Maybe the enemy knows that when we find it, we become unshakable.  David said:

                "I have set the Lord continually before me.  Because He is at my right hand, I                                                   will not be shaken."  Psalm 16:8

            Once we establish this habit, this position, this posture, the enemy loses important ground.  Something in our lives becomes untouchable.  And it’s the most important seat in our hearts-it’s the very core of who we are.  This is where our identity flows from.  We find our true self in the eyes of our Creator.  We know who we are when we know WHOSE we are.  We know who we are when we sit before Him.

                                    

Whining, Waffles and Whispers~The Way to Our New Identity

          "NOOOOOOOOOO . . . "  I had been hearing it all week out of my 4 year old's mouth.  Was it just a rebellious streak he was on?  Was it because it was the last week of preschool and his sadness over the end of the school year was coming out in anger against me?  Was he just testing me?  His magnet on his "Obedience Race Track" hadn't budged in at least 7 days.  We were at a standstill, like an old western film show down, Daniel on one side of the ghost town and me at the other, waiting for the other one to give up in surrender.  Well what does any good parent do in a time like this?

    Take 'em out for waffles of course.

     That wasn't all I did.  But, I felt the need to connect in a deeper way with my son hoping to find some clue as to why he was acting out.  I wanted to let him know my love and enjoyment of him hadn't changed, even though his behavior had.  We had a great time, laughing together.   We talked about what it meant that God was our Abba,  Our Daddy. He loves and even adores us even in our maddest, worst, most rebellious place.  His love doesn't shift like our behavior can.  I felt like this was the ticket.   And if it wasn't the ticket, maybe at least it was the turning point.

    But after school, the behavior continued.  Finally, at one point after the 5th or 6th time out, I remembered what we had discussed that morning.  I looked straight into the angry, distorted face of my preschooler and said, "Daniel we really, really love you.  Abba really loves you RIGHT NOW.  We know you have what it takes to obey fast.  We know you can do it."


    And something clicked.  The light turned on.  Something broke.  Life was spoken right in the midst of discipline.  Confidence was imparted.  Budding righteousness was affirmed.  New identity was received.  And Daniel's out ward behavior shifted because he received his inner identity.

     "Yes Dad."
     "Sure, Mom."
     "Okay, I will do it."

     And right there, God revealed something very important.

     It is the same with us.  It's only after we receive our inner identity that our outward behavior  can really change.  Just like Daniel, we need to know we are enjoyed and loved right where we are.  God's love for us never moves or shifts, even in the midst of discipline or testing.  Daniel's behavior wasn't accepted, but He was still held tight in the Father's grip.  And it's the same with us.   His wasn't the identity of disobedience, even though that was how he was acting.  His was the identity of a beloved Son.  And so is ours.


      "God calls the things that are not as though they are." Romans 4:17


     In the place of testing, discipline, and disobedience is where we need to tune our ear the most.  Its here that we need to learn to hear the voice of our Abba, and shut out the voice of the condemnation.   We need to hear The Father tell us of His unwavering affection and love that beckons us to get back up when we fall.   We need to let him fan into flame the smoldering embers residing on the inside whispering to us that we are indeed "more than over comers" (Romans 8:37).



   

Passed-Over: The anecdote for the feeling of being forgotten

       Today marks the beginning of the very important Jewish holiday of Passover.  It's a time for Jews (and Christians) to consider the miracle He performed in Egypt to those who obeyed and covered their doorposts in lamb's blood.  Those that heeded God's instructions would not receive the blow of waking up to the loss of their children.  The blood was a sign to The Spirit to passover those homes, while those who went bare of blood were struck with sickness that killed their precious first born children.  (Exodus 11:4-8, 12:29)

        For Christians, this was also a foretelling to the coming Lamb of God, Jesus,  whose blood was spilled so they would not receive the wrath of God.  It falls near the celebration of The Resurrection on Christian calendars to emphasize the powerful parallel between the Old Testament and New Testament stories.

         But, today I am speaking of another type of passover.  What do I mean?  I am talking about the feeling of being passed over by God or others.  I am talking about the feeling of going unnoticed or giftings going unwanted.  I am talking about the feeling of being forgotten or the thought that others seem to be chosen over us.  Grown men still wrestle with this and mature women still fall under its grip.

    Ever been there?  I have. The ducks are in a row.  Your expectations are detailed in how you believe things will play out.  Your plans and dreams for success are budding with hope.  You can see how its all going to work out.  The vision is clear.  It's all within your grasp.


    And then, wham!  No one sees your potential.  Or the one person or people you thought would see it don't get it at all.  Your dreams and plans are thrown under the bus.  No one sees the dream in your heart.  You start thinking maybe you are crazy and not hearing from God at all.


    Perhaps though the focus is in the wrong place?  Perhaps somewhere along the road, we started crafting our plans a little too carefully, instead of leaving them in God's hands?  Perhaps we started looking to that  someone or group of people that we thought would promote us?

           David knew he would be King someday.  Joseph (maybe) understood he would be a leader of some sort, based on his dreams.  But I bet they never dreamed of the road they would have to travel on to get there.  I bet they never knew ahead of time what dream-crushing process God would bring them through.


         And in this place-  the dream-dashing, character-shaping, heartbreaking season- is where many of us give up too soon.   We get our eyes on "our oppressor" (or those who don't "get us").  We start to believe they actually have the power to take away the promises God has spoken.  Because, really, it seems like they do.  We shift our focus onto our circumstances and decide they are even stronger than the Almighty who whispered those dreams to our heart in the first place.  We can wrestle with un forgiveness against those who (we think) won't promote us.  We might even be tempted to slander them, so we look more powerful than we really are. 

      But our focus is in the wrong place.  And all the while the enemy is laughing.  Because he is selling us a lie.  And the wound goes deeper and deeper.

     God has not left us.  He is actually passionately pursuing us in this season.  He is after our heart and shaping our character.  He is emphasizing the truth that He isn't after our productiveness, but still enjoys us in our hidden-ness. He is removing the self-effort from our dream, so that only He gets the glory.  He is testing our focus.  Are our eyes still fixed on Him?  Or have we digested the lie that others control our destiny?  Are we surrendering our expectations and plans, letting God shape our road to success?

In the wilderness

       As John Bevere says in "Bait of Satan", "No one can take away our destiny but us."

            Forgive those who you think are passing you over.  Embrace God's route to your promise and let go of your own.  Fix your eyes on the Promise Keeper, the only one who can actually promote you. Embrace the character-shaping and humility-making that God is doing in you.  LET GO OF THE LIE THAT YOU HAVE BEEN PASSED OVER.  You are actually experiencing God's favor  and are right in the middle of His plan.  You are actually on the road to your destiny.  And no matter what cave, wilderness or dungeon you find yourself in, God is still able to pull you out AT THE RIGHT TIME and fulfill His promise.  Only He can promote you.

                      

"cave" 

Daniel locked in an old jail cell

Olivia in an old jail cell

    Repeat the words of David who continually put His trust in the Lord, no matter the circumstance.  Cling to the attitude of Our Savior, who by His blood saved the world from God's wrath.  He trusted Himself to God, and thereby saved God's children.

              "My times are in your hands" Psalm 31:15

     

                 

Let Winter Have it's Way

                         Just a few days ago, the sun was shining.  In my backyard, children were shedding their layers and jumping with glee on our trampoline in the warmth of the Spring sun.
                            
                        But things have shifted in the air again.  It feels like winter has returned.   The chill in the air chilled us to the bone.  So, we made the last fire in our fireplace this year until winter hits again (we hope).
                           

winter scene
Kansas City winter

                        I was able to get out to a quiet place yesterday and meditate on these things: "Whyyyyyy God do we have to have winter? "  (Can you hear the childish exasperation in my voice?)
                        

Kansas City Winter Scene

                       As I viewed the panoramic tree line and gray overcast sky, I realized we have to let winter have it's way.  

                       What is the purpose of the winter season? 

     Winter provides a dormancy; a rest from the busyness of producing leaves and fruit.  A great internal work is being done that cannot be viewed externally.  But, the leaves are gone.  The fruit can't be produced, no matter what you do.  Even the color is washed out of the vegetation.  


      Have you ever felt like this?  No matter how hard you try, nothing externally wonderful is coming forth?  Your color is gone; the things you once found joy in are no longer a source of strength?  You might be in a winter season.  

      To the ordinary eye, it can seem like a time of death and dying.  But this is NOT true at all!  Something marvelous and purposeful is actually happening underneath the surface, in the internal structure of trees and plants.  And something wonderful might be happening in you!

Josiah, 3 years old, Kansas City, MO

         So often during this season we can get focused on all that's missing on the outside:  Outward success, financial gain, better production and maybe lack of His felt presence.  Instead, I wonder if we probed the Holy Spirit about what HE was doing IN us, we might gain a better understanding about what is happening outwardly?  

           For us, winter can be a time of drawing nearer to the fire of God's heart to find our source of warmth.  Its there, in the heat of His love, we realize our worth doesn't come from what we produce but from being His child.  We can let our roots reach deep and draw from the Water of His Word for our sustenance.  We can ask Him what changes or pruning need to be done while the cold winds blow.   If we surrender, we will see the wisdom of His ways.  

     Winter can be a time of great internal workings if we let it be.  Or we can choose the other option which will get us no where.  We can get frustrated that our dreams seem buried and our heart's desires not being fulfilled.  We can miss the whole purpose of our lack of production.  Or we can see under the surface and utilize it for The Kingdom's  richest gain.  

             See, the fruit we ultimately produce must be WORTHY.  It must be pure and truly life giving.  It can't just be weak, small, diseased and inedible.  It must come from a strong branch.  Good fruit has to come from a strong foundation.  A strong source.  And this strength only comes through the grip of winter and realizing HE is the ONE who produces this kind of fruit.  Not us.  Only the trees and branches that have felt the chill of winter and cooperated with it's force will produce worthy fruit when the Spring comes.  And it will come.  He is True.  His Word doesn't fail.  And all His promises are Yes and Amen. The Spring season will come again.  

Spring green!  Kansas City, MO

Flower, Butchart Gardens, Victoria, B.C.

Baby bird on our back deck Kansas City, MO

Woman, You are Strong: Strength Defined

                             Yesterday was a day to celebrate women.  I was honored by this.  Clearly, around the world the mistreatment and attack on women is very real.  Growing up in this culture, America, I experienced something maybe entirely different then most women who live in severely male dominated cultures experience every day.

                          As a child, I was privileged to be told I could do anything, be anything and that there wasn't anything I couldn't do.  I believed it.

                       Growing up I had aspirations of becoming a lawyer, a businesswoman, a marine biologist and news anchorwoman.

                         I was going to take on the world . . . and win.

                       I still believe this, that nothing is impossible for me.  But my definition of strength and being a strong woman has changed for me over the years.


                       That mouthy little girl who could argue her way out of every corner was about to get a wake up call.  Someone was about to redefine the word STRONG for me.  No longer would  quick-witted come backs and smart-mouth monologues littered with trash talk count towards my credit.  To explain, I met a man who embodied more strength and resolve than I could ever possess on a good day.  But His strength was reigned in.  His strength was immovable, like a freight train set on course that no one, not even His own weakness (if that were possible) could derail.   He wouldn't even argue or raise his voice and yet His authority when He spoke caused thousands to sit silent, hanging on every word he uttered.

                             The Gospel completely messes with us.  When Jesus came He one-upped everyone a thousand times over.  He raised the bar.  For me, what I considered strong, He considered weak.  Whaaa?  I will repeat:

                        What I considered STRENGTH, He actually considered WEAKNESS.

                         This is because He didn't just have strength, like me . . .  a wild, unharnessed beastly aggression towards those who disagreed with me.  But He possessed meekness. . . something entirely different.  He has 550 volts of strength running through his core, along with massive resolve and ability to turn off the switch.  He has ALL the strength coupled with the ability to harness that strength.

                          Because He was fully God~the One who just spoke and the cosmos was created, the One who just touched and people were completely healed, the One who just uttered a few words and humans were released of demons~He has ALL power.  And yet, He has ALL self-control.  He allowed Himself to be beaten to a pulp and nailed to a cross .  He utilized this GOD-sized self control and allowed men, the very ones he created, to mock him, beat him and nail Him to a tree without one ounce of fight, grit or resistance.  He even said, "I could've released 12 legions of angels . . ."  But He didn't.  He knew the capacity of authority He had to control the situation, and yet He gave it up and trusted Himself to His Father.  He had complete meekness.  Completed with trust in His Father.  Complete strength, but  under complete control.

                         That wasn't all.  Many tried to "launch him into ministry" before it was time.  They saw the miracles, the power, the crowds drawn to Him like moths to a flame.  They saw the potential of His platform.  But He wasn't having it.  He wasn't relying on human will to make him popular.  He didn't need the praise, accolade or acknowledgement of the world to boost his ego.  Because He had none.  He had the strength, but He possessed the self-control to match that Super-sized strength.  He knew there was a time for Him to be lifted up and exalted.  He trusted the Father for that moment, not the voices of those surrounding him.  

               But many of us have been wounded.  Trusting anyone is difficult.  We have had to fight for everything it feels like sometimes.  But, trust is what is at the heart of meekness.  Jesus gave control to One greater than Him.  

              How on earth do we trust again once that trust has been assaulted?  How do we give up control again when we feel the rug has been pulled out from under us?  
   
               Jesus said, "Take my yoke upon you.  Learn of me, for I am gentle and humble (or meek) of heart."  Matthew 11:29

               He's entirely different from anyone else.  He is always gentle, all the time.  He's 100% trustworthy, able to turn around even the worst situations. He's always faithful, even when we are faithless.   He always has our BEST interest in mind, even when it doesn't feel like it.  He is humble, not accusing us and completely patient, even in our failings.  We can trust Him.  We can learn to trust again.  We CAN have a strength rooted in trust.  We CAN have a strength rooted in meekness.

                I still consider myself a "strong woman".   But my goals are a little bit different.  Okay, my goals to become an even stronger woman are A LOT different.  I want to lean into the One who can harness this powerful gift of strength.  He not only has given it to me, but to all women.  And yet without Him, I think we missing the boat.

                       We need His meekness, not just raw girl power.  We need His resolve to walk in gentleness, not just wild aggression.  We need His ability to perceive His timing, not just use our strength to exalt ourselves.

                        We are women.  We are moms.  We are businesswomen.  We are daughters.  We are grandmothers.  We are lawyers.  We are writers and marine biologists and everything in between.  But we are also carriers of His meekness, a rare form of strength that our world desperately needs.




TO BE CLEAR                          
*** In NO way am I promoting abuse or relating the abuse that Jesus suffered on our behalf to suffering abuse in relationships.  What Jesus suffered He did for us, as a specific act obedience from the Father.  Abuse in relationships should not be tolerated in any way, shape or form.  Abuse should not be the manner of any relationship and should be condemned in every way.  Healthy boundaries should always be drawn in these type of situations with the help and support of outside resources.                            

                       

For All the Broken Ones . . .

                    "Mommy, Mommy, its my turn to go with you!"  Olivia urgently reminds me.  We have started taking turns when we go to the beach.  One on one time with our children has become harder and harder to pull off these days.  They have figured out if they get up early enough we can more easily squeeze in a "date".    Josiah had already been beach combing earlier with Dad.  And now it was Olivia's turn.

                    So, we walk.  We gaze.  We let the morning sun warm our cheeks and feel the morning breeze chill our legs.  Fishermen are already out with a trusty herron or two alongside to cherry pick from their catch.  And we are searching.

                       "Ooooh, look at this one!  It looks like a heart!"  Olivia squeals with delight.

                       "Its broken though.  Try to look for the ones without the holes."  I reply, teaching her from years of experience in the craft of shell searching.

                       "But I like it." Olivia responds with disappointment.

                       Okay, you can't argue with that, can you?

                        "Okay put it in your bag." I reply.


              Over and over again, she is drawn to the broken ones.  I patiently point out the flaws and she tells me about the beautiful eye-popping colors and the redemptive new shape she sees formed by broken edges.   And I realize its much like God with us.  We can't impress Him with our flawlessness.  He is drawn to our broken edges. He takes delight in our unique bold colors and non-uniform shapes. He isn't afraid of our brokenness, but rather drawn to it.  He dwells with the broken and brings redemption to our flaws (Psalm 51:17).  He takes what another calls broken and calls it beautiful, just like Olivia was doing this morning with her tiny treasures.

             
                          The sea is calm today.  I remember the Sea of Glass that The Good Book says surrounds His Throne.  It stretches for miles, and I try to picture a Man in the middle and multitudes leaning in for a glance.

                 A thought stirs inside that forms a knot in my throat and causes my eyes to water.  Not only does He know the grains of sand on the seashore-every single one.  But, He also knows the shells, every single one.  Every single flawless one.  Every single broken one.  Even every single shell my Olivia would find today.  He knows it all.  He is God over the vast, endless spaces and God over the broken, tiny particles of sand.  He is God over the countless miles of horizon and He knows each brightly colored  shell along our path.   This One, He is unsearchable, and yet He has invited us to search Him out.

                 

Do You Love Correction? I am working on it . . .

On my heart tonight: "Whoever loves discipline loves knowledge but whoever hates correction is stupid." Proverbs 12:1. 

          You heard it here, from the book that minces no words-if you hate correction you are unwise (in nicer, more palatable terms). Of course we can examine what this means a little further and realize the author was saying "God's correction is good, why despise it?! "

          So often we can lump any negative feelings we have in the same pile.  Bad feelings=bad and that must mean there is nothing God wants to show us in them.  It's true, it might be just a passing wind or an onslaught from our enemy.  But God could also want to show us something within them.  The only way to find out is to ask HIM.  We can DO NOTHING without Him (John 15:5).  So we need His help to examine these emotions.  But we would rather not.  Or we would rather "think our way through it".  Or we would rather push it all away.  We do this because we don't know how to handle the way we have known correction in the past.  It was either too harsh, without mercy or too light.  And because there is no perfect human authority figure we are all on some variance of that scale.  But, there was a man who was perfect.  He embodied all that is good.  He has a Father who likes to bestow on us good gifts.  His Spirit loves to lead us gently, but very specifically when we ask Him.  He loves to pick us back up again when we mess up and lead us into a life  of right thinking and behaving that is life giving and full of joy.  We can be really hard on ourselves.  And the enemy is always looking to condemn us too.  So sometimes its much easier just to put all those negative emotions in a pile and say "forget about it!"  But, I believe if we hold God's hand and ask Him to help us, we can find some real jewels of His correction in that pile of "you know what".  We might find lies lurking behind those emotions, empowering them.  We might find behavior and thinking that needs His readjusting and correction.  Let that pile be the fertilizer from which we mine His truth. It is worth examining those emotions to find the root. 

               For example. you might be feeling criticized by others, but why not examine the root? Maybe it's because you yourself have been critical of others in your thoughts? Or maybe there is still a root of un-forgiveness there? When we hold harsh judgement against others it holds true we will actually experience that harsh judgement for ourselves. (Matthew 6:14)

                  And guilt?  is it always something to just toss away?? No we need to examine it. Is it God actually telling us there is something not right in our behavior? If we know God's awesomely good nature we trust He will be very specific and gentle to show us if we need to change something when we ask Him. (Luke 11:13 ) When we toss out these feelings too fast rather than go to the root we actually could toss out God's conviction or correction. By learning to examine these feelings more closely and ask the Faithful Holy Spirit to guide us, we will become ones who love discipline. That's where I want to be!

              Ever learning and growing to Love His correction.  Its hard to embrace, but He's worth it!

(In a follow-up blog I will post some truths from Margaret Thoerkelson and a teaching she did on discerning between God's voice and the enemy's.  We can know exactly whose voice we are hearing and how to avoid pitfalls of deception)