The Overcoming Power of Rejoicing in All Things

                  Confession:  For several years, I had been in a cycle of anxiety regarding an ongoing health issue with someone very dear to me.  I didn't really realize it because as I would pray eventually the wave of anxiety would pass.  But what I didn't recognize is that it just got shoved to the back burner and I was merely just distracting myself with the many other issues I face daily.  Its easy to distract yourself in this life.


                  But as the years have gone on, while I have been trying to trust God, the situation hasn't really changed to the degree that I have hoped.  With as much boldness I could muster, mixed with some anxiety and frustration, I began REALLY  talking to God about it. 

                  WHAT is going on?  WHY haven't we seen the shift in this area I had hoped for?

I sensed the most unexpected response from the Lord, in the midst of schooling someone (wink) about Philippians 4:4-8. 
   We have all read this passage.  I have gone over it many times myself in the past, especially when those overpowering waves of anxiety have tried to pull me under their relentless current.



4 Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, rejoice. 5 Let your reasonableness[d] be known to everyone. The Lord is at hand; 6 do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. 7 And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.


          Oh I was on a roll, breaking this passage down into 4 easy steps for my friend to digest:

   "First, you REJOICE, whatever the situation is.  Then, you pray or talk to God honestly about it.  Tell him exactly what you need or want.  Finally, you thank him, for who He is, what He will do.  And then you leave it with Him and wait, as you trust Him.  His peace guards your heart and mind."

         As I was explaining this, I felt that all familiar nudge.  It hit me.

   "You have never done this with your own situation."  

  I thought back for a moment, my mind racing through all the years of prayer over this issue.  I had listened to God. I had pleaded in the night.  I had fervently prayed.  And yet it was true.  At the onset of this injury, I had not done what I was explaining to someone else they needed to do.

      So I did it.  I simply agreed with God.  

      "I rejoice in this situation."    

I may have entered into this longer, I can't remember.  But something happened.  A shift occurred inside.

When we rejoice over a seemingly impossible situation, we are declaring something BIG.

We are saying, "We are no longer UNDER the unbearable weight of this moment, but in Christ, we are OVER it."  

     We are agreeing that whatever we are facing, even though it could crush us in our own strength, is nothing compared to God's incredible power.  We also aren't resisting the situation, but rather surrendering to God in it.  We place Him in our hearts where He already resides in Heaven:  On the throne.

     I realized there was something God was after in me.  He loves all the prayer, and how we reach for Him in a tough time.  That's great.  But he was also wanting a response of trust, faith from my heart of hearts.  

   "Daddy, you got this.  I trust you.  I rejoice."

"The Pillar of Cloud"
Moses leading the
Israelites

      It was the same response He was after from the Israelites when they came upon the Red Sea.  And its the same response He is after in you and me.

     A shift was made, a table was turned that day.  Clarity of God's purposes began to arise. Anxiety was extinguished as I was able to settle safely again into the Almighty.

      

Pushing Back the Clouds of Offense

         

           As I stood in worship, mumbling words I could hardly get off my lips, it dawned on me.  This. was. not. fun.  Something wasn't right.  Usually worship was a place where I found safety and peace.  I could just absorb the love of God and enjoy His presence.  I could usually just rest in the little haven God created as I focused on Him.

           But this morning was different.  Anger was clinching its claws into my skin.  My throat was tight and my shoulders filled with tension.  I couldn't get comfortable.  I wanted to run.

       There was a situation that had surfaced that brought hurt and pain into my path.

         However, I had been in relationship with God long enough to know that running wasn't going to fix anything.  The absence of His felt presence was an indication that something was off . . . IN ME.  What was it?  I was MAD.  And I was telling God how I felt.  And I was RIGHT.  I knew it and God knew it (hear any tones of self-righteousness in there?).  And really, looking at the situation with natural eyes, anyone would agree me.  No doubt, hands down,  I was right.

       But if I was right (which I was, by the way), then where did God go?  What exactly was the problem?

     After asking Him what I needed to change (which asking the question in and of itself was like swallowing a fist full of thumb tacks), I knew deep down what I needed to do to displace the offense in my spirit.  I wanted God more than to be right.  I wanted God's peace more than I wanted my offense.  And in reality, I NEEDED God more than I needed to be right.  I had lived too many years in depression and isolation, without His Presence, to go back in that direction again.

          I knew what I had to do.
     
         "Bless and do not curse."  I Peter 3:9

        I had to serve the very same ones I was offended with.

       

                And the arguments began raging again . . .

             

       But I had been there before so I knew what would immediately still the voices.  I knew what would displace this cloud of offense.  I knew what would silence the accuser of the Brethren.

           "Bless and do not curse.  Forgive, the way you have been forgiven."

           So, I did it.  Against my feelings, against my anger, I chose.


         As I chose, and took action something amazing happened.  The wind and waves hushed.  The clouds stopped their swirling and voices stopped their whispering.  Peace rushed over my wearied, winded soul.  And clarity followed.  God's merciful heart for those who hurt me was revealed.  I was able to worship.  All was well again.

"Pushing Back the Darkness", 18"x20"

   
_____________________________________________________________________

Fast forward, 2 days later . . .

    My kids and I were driving through town when we saw the funniest sight.  At first it was funny.  But then we realized how very pitiful the situation was.

         One car was pulling into a parking lot while another was facing it, trying to drive out.  Neither would move for the other.

        Josiah looked at me and said, "Mom, her face was MAD. She had a really mean face."  He was speaking of the view he had of one of the drivers.

     Sometimes I think this is how the church looks to the world.  We are often caught up in the most trivial issues and offended with small things.  They seem SO important to us in the moment too.  Yes, there are some things we NEED to stand for and NOT back down.  But too often, we are fooled into standing for OUR stance or our position that we ARE NOT standing FOR our brother.  So there we stand.  And all the while the Holy Spirit is sneaking His way out the back door, because we no longer represent HIM well to the world.  And who is HE?  He is  . . . . .

    patient and kind.  He does not envy or boast.  He is not proud or rude. He is not easily provoked . . . just for starters.  (I Corinthians 13:1)
         

    And I am not speaking as one who doesn't battle this spirit of offense from time to time.  I am right there with you in the ring with my gloves on.

    My encouragement to you, as a brother or sister in the Lord, is to not take the gloves off.  Stay in the ring.  No matter how tired you are, don't give up.   And don't get fooled into fighting the wrong enemy, like I almost did.

    When we DO what the Word says, clarity comes.  Love is ushered in again.  We see clearly God's heart for a brother or sister again.

     For it says, "We battle not against flesh and blood but against powers, forces and principalities."
   (Ephesians 6:12)

Truly, love covers a multitude of sins.

Tackled by Goodness and Mercy

  "Wait I want to talk!"
               
   "No, me first."

                   My kids are arguing about who goes first as we try to have morning prayer together before they leave the house.  Its real life.  Its messy and loud.  And they are learning.

                  But finally as they settle and we snuggle, God shows up.  He can handle our chaos and in one moment step in and bring order.  He likes kids.  Wasn't it He that said, "Let the little children come to me and do not hinder them, for to them belongs the Kingdom."  Matthew 19:14

              Why, they are just kids?  Why, they are still learning how to behave?  Why, they are still learning?

               I think that's why.  They know they are beginning.  They know they are learning.  And in that place, they are FULLY BELIEVING.


           A Psalm has been on my heart this morning.  I am singing a song over and over in my mind.  Its not one with an upbeat rhythm.  But it has an old-timey tune.

"Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me, all the days of, the days of my liiiiiife."

      This song,  it sticks with me all morning.  His goodness and mercy stick with me too.  I can't seem to shake it.  They have all these years, I realize.  Through trouble and trial, my darkness and my disobedience (which is a thing), He has been there, clinging to me, pursuing me.  Consequences?  Sure, I have had plenty.  Darkness?  Oh yeah, had that.  Trouble and trial? I can name a few. But, His mercy and grace I have had far more.  When I really look back I can clearly see His mark, and His grip. His goodness is following close behind. 

    As we open up Psalm 23, I am struggling for words to help my kids understand what this phrase means.  I remember what a friend had told me.

      "This actually means God's goodness and mercy will hunt us down, pursue us, run after us and overtake us.  Who wants to be taken over with GOODNESS AND MERCY?" They nod and raise hands.

           One of my stronger children remarks, "I don't!"
           "You mean you don't want to have good things follow after you, chase you down?"
           "Oh, wait, I do." I think he misunderstood me.

"Remember how when Daddy chases you during hide and seek and then he finds you?  He has a big smile on his face.  He tackles you down to the ground and you guys laugh?"

       They nod in unison.

"Its the same way with God's mercy and goodness when we follow Him.  He follows us, chases after us.  Do you want that?"

        They nod again.  And we pray.

Shoo! We make it through a devotional and I am thanking God for words to say (because I have no idea what I am doing). 

   Dad calls, "I am leaving! Who wants to go to VBS?"

"MEEEEEEE!!!" They all cry as they run out the door.

       Thank God for VBS and VBS workers.  Lord bless them all.

Full Steam Ahead! Living Life Out of Our Internal Operating System

           "Full steam ahead!"  The Captain directed.

             On a gray afternoon years ago I recall watching a National Geographic documentary about ice breakers-ships that are made with extra strong hulls that are able to break through the icy waters of the antarctic.  One captain's story was followed.  He was explaining how in the past, steering one of these monstrous ships was a very complicated and difficult job.  Everything was manual.  The captain had to do everything-know the exact coordinates all the time and actually steer the ship-making sure all the while that it hit the ice at the proper speed.  It was a very involved, difficult job with a lot of responsibility on the shoulders of whoever was in charge.

            Now, the ship's captain leaned back against the window which detailed a beautiful panoramic view.  He explained how now that new internal operating systems had been installed in these massive titans of the sea, his job was a lot less stressful.   The complex computers took care of everything-coordinates, proper speed settings, sonar to locate large spots of ice.  He just had to watch and give the ship's crew their orders.  Here he sat leaning, relaxing almost, enjoying the ride.


           As I was reminded of this storyline, I thought about our own lives if we know Christ.  I thought about what it can be like when we don't follow Him.  What happens we take the wheel and stop trusting the deposit of His Spirit on the inside to guide us?  What happens when we stop talking to Him, reading the Bible and leaning on Him for our strength and direction?

         I know what happens.  We have all been there far too often.  I have been there too often.

         The waters of life grow choppy.  The icy thick obstacles in our way seem insurmountable.  We can't rest and we are constantly on edge.  We need to control everybody and know EVERYTHING.

          But something remarkable happens we adjust to His leadership.  Something wonderful occurs when we just simply ask for His help.  An amazing internal peace begins to lead us.  This peace goes past our knowledge of those big icebergs in our way.  They are nothing compared to the internal power that resides inside of us, if we have asked Him to take over and dwell in us.

          We can sit back and enjoy the ride.  Sure, there will be obstacles along the way.  Big obstacles.  But, we can rest easy knowing His Spirit on the inside will safely take us to our destination and our destiny.

     

       
         

The One Thing That Cannot be Taken

     As I was cleaning the house one day, I was talking with the Lord.  I was frustrated about some things that seemed to go south.  Then that led me to complain about some dreams that I had that seem to fizzle out.  I was frustrated about things that seemed to be  . . . taken.  Or it felt that way at least.  What was going on?  Then, that all too familiar whisper echoed deep within my spirit. 

                   “Mary chose the good part, and it will NOT be taken from her.” (Read Luke 10:38-42)

              Ohhhh.   I realized there were so many things that could be taken from me, so many things from this life which can be taken.  Jobs can be lost.  Relationships can give out.  Dreams can be lost.  Reputations can be smeared.  Money can be drained.  Even ministries can end.  Our bodies even are decaying as we speak (so encouraging, I know).  And time is a thief. 

            But there is ONE incredible thing God himself says cannot be taken away from us.  In the midst of my complaint, I felt RELIEF.  There was one thing I could invest in that no one could touch!  There was something, if I gave it time and attention, nothing could steal!  What a stunning and beautiful promise Jesus gave to Mary that day.  I can’t imagine the conversations between Martha and Mary after this dialogue with their beloved Master.   Or maybe there was just awkward silence.   I can’t imagine the feelings Martha felt at hearing her precious Lord’s words about her sister. 

                                      There is NOTHING that can steal the time we invest sitting at His feet. Jesus says  It can never be taken away.  And, we will see the most warfare trying to distract us from that place.  I know this all too well as a mom.

Martha did too . . .

          There are constant dirty dishes in the sink.  There is an unending flow of laundry.  The bathrooms are cleaned, but then I turn around and the toilet . . .

          Then there are the needs of our kids . . . endless needs.  These precious gifts require massive amounts of love, patience and sacrifice. 

                                            If it’s not one thing, it’s another.

             Why does it seem like there is so much in the way of us establishing this precious practice in our lives?  Why does it seem like all of hell wants to keep us from this place of prayer, hearing the Lord’s heart? 

          Maybe the enemy knows that when we find it, we become unshakable.  David said:

                "I have set the Lord continually before me.  Because He is at my right hand, I                                                   will not be shaken."  Psalm 16:8

            Once we establish this habit, this position, this posture, the enemy loses important ground.  Something in our lives becomes untouchable.  And it’s the most important seat in our hearts-it’s the very core of who we are.  This is where our identity flows from.  We find our true self in the eyes of our Creator.  We know who we are when we know WHOSE we are.  We know who we are when we sit before Him.

                                    

Whining, Waffles and Whispers~The Way to Our New Identity

          "NOOOOOOOOOO . . . "  I had been hearing it all week out of my 4 year old's mouth.  Was it just a rebellious streak he was on?  Was it because it was the last week of preschool and his sadness over the end of the school year was coming out in anger against me?  Was he just testing me?  His magnet on his "Obedience Race Track" hadn't budged in at least 7 days.  We were at a standstill, like an old western film show down, Daniel on one side of the ghost town and me at the other, waiting for the other one to give up in surrender.  Well what does any good parent do in a time like this?

    Take 'em out for waffles of course.

     That wasn't all I did.  But, I felt the need to connect in a deeper way with my son hoping to find some clue as to why he was acting out.  I wanted to let him know my love and enjoyment of him hadn't changed, even though his behavior had.  We had a great time, laughing together.   We talked about what it meant that God was our Abba,  Our Daddy. He loves and even adores us even in our maddest, worst, most rebellious place.  His love doesn't shift like our behavior can.  I felt like this was the ticket.   And if it wasn't the ticket, maybe at least it was the turning point.

    But after school, the behavior continued.  Finally, at one point after the 5th or 6th time out, I remembered what we had discussed that morning.  I looked straight into the angry, distorted face of my preschooler and said, "Daniel we really, really love you.  Abba really loves you RIGHT NOW.  We know you have what it takes to obey fast.  We know you can do it."


    And something clicked.  The light turned on.  Something broke.  Life was spoken right in the midst of discipline.  Confidence was imparted.  Budding righteousness was affirmed.  New identity was received.  And Daniel's out ward behavior shifted because he received his inner identity.

     "Yes Dad."
     "Sure, Mom."
     "Okay, I will do it."

     And right there, God revealed something very important.

     It is the same with us.  It's only after we receive our inner identity that our outward behavior  can really change.  Just like Daniel, we need to know we are enjoyed and loved right where we are.  God's love for us never moves or shifts, even in the midst of discipline or testing.  Daniel's behavior wasn't accepted, but He was still held tight in the Father's grip.  And it's the same with us.   His wasn't the identity of disobedience, even though that was how he was acting.  His was the identity of a beloved Son.  And so is ours.


      "God calls the things that are not as though they are." Romans 4:17


     In the place of testing, discipline, and disobedience is where we need to tune our ear the most.  Its here that we need to learn to hear the voice of our Abba, and shut out the voice of the condemnation.   We need to hear The Father tell us of His unwavering affection and love that beckons us to get back up when we fall.   We need to let him fan into flame the smoldering embers residing on the inside whispering to us that we are indeed "more than over comers" (Romans 8:37).



   

Passed-Over: The anecdote for the feeling of being forgotten

       Today marks the beginning of the very important Jewish holiday of Passover.  It's a time for Jews (and Christians) to consider the miracle He performed in Egypt to those who obeyed and covered their doorposts in lamb's blood.  Those that heeded God's instructions would not receive the blow of waking up to the loss of their children.  The blood was a sign to The Spirit to passover those homes, while those who went bare of blood were struck with sickness that killed their precious first born children.  (Exodus 11:4-8, 12:29)

        For Christians, this was also a foretelling to the coming Lamb of God, Jesus,  whose blood was spilled so they would not receive the wrath of God.  It falls near the celebration of The Resurrection on Christian calendars to emphasize the powerful parallel between the Old Testament and New Testament stories.

         But, today I am speaking of another type of passover.  What do I mean?  I am talking about the feeling of being passed over by God or others.  I am talking about the feeling of going unnoticed or giftings going unwanted.  I am talking about the feeling of being forgotten or the thought that others seem to be chosen over us.  Grown men still wrestle with this and mature women still fall under its grip.

    Ever been there?  I have. The ducks are in a row.  Your expectations are detailed in how you believe things will play out.  Your plans and dreams for success are budding with hope.  You can see how its all going to work out.  The vision is clear.  It's all within your grasp.


    And then, wham!  No one sees your potential.  Or the one person or people you thought would see it don't get it at all.  Your dreams and plans are thrown under the bus.  No one sees the dream in your heart.  You start thinking maybe you are crazy and not hearing from God at all.


    Perhaps though the focus is in the wrong place?  Perhaps somewhere along the road, we started crafting our plans a little too carefully, instead of leaving them in God's hands?  Perhaps we started looking to that  someone or group of people that we thought would promote us?

           David knew he would be King someday.  Joseph (maybe) understood he would be a leader of some sort, based on his dreams.  But I bet they never dreamed of the road they would have to travel on to get there.  I bet they never knew ahead of time what dream-crushing process God would bring them through.


         And in this place-  the dream-dashing, character-shaping, heartbreaking season- is where many of us give up too soon.   We get our eyes on "our oppressor" (or those who don't "get us").  We start to believe they actually have the power to take away the promises God has spoken.  Because, really, it seems like they do.  We shift our focus onto our circumstances and decide they are even stronger than the Almighty who whispered those dreams to our heart in the first place.  We can wrestle with un forgiveness against those who (we think) won't promote us.  We might even be tempted to slander them, so we look more powerful than we really are. 

      But our focus is in the wrong place.  And all the while the enemy is laughing.  Because he is selling us a lie.  And the wound goes deeper and deeper.

     God has not left us.  He is actually passionately pursuing us in this season.  He is after our heart and shaping our character.  He is emphasizing the truth that He isn't after our productiveness, but still enjoys us in our hidden-ness. He is removing the self-effort from our dream, so that only He gets the glory.  He is testing our focus.  Are our eyes still fixed on Him?  Or have we digested the lie that others control our destiny?  Are we surrendering our expectations and plans, letting God shape our road to success?

In the wilderness

       As John Bevere says in "Bait of Satan", "No one can take away our destiny but us."

            Forgive those who you think are passing you over.  Embrace God's route to your promise and let go of your own.  Fix your eyes on the Promise Keeper, the only one who can actually promote you. Embrace the character-shaping and humility-making that God is doing in you.  LET GO OF THE LIE THAT YOU HAVE BEEN PASSED OVER.  You are actually experiencing God's favor  and are right in the middle of His plan.  You are actually on the road to your destiny.  And no matter what cave, wilderness or dungeon you find yourself in, God is still able to pull you out AT THE RIGHT TIME and fulfill His promise.  Only He can promote you.

                      

"cave" 

Daniel locked in an old jail cell

Olivia in an old jail cell

    Repeat the words of David who continually put His trust in the Lord, no matter the circumstance.  Cling to the attitude of Our Savior, who by His blood saved the world from God's wrath.  He trusted Himself to God, and thereby saved God's children.

              "My times are in your hands" Psalm 31:15

     

                 

Let Winter Have it's Way

                         Just a few days ago, the sun was shining.  In my backyard, children were shedding their layers and jumping with glee on our trampoline in the warmth of the Spring sun.
                            
                        But things have shifted in the air again.  It feels like winter has returned.   The chill in the air chilled us to the bone.  So, we made the last fire in our fireplace this year until winter hits again (we hope).
                           

winter scene
Kansas City winter

                        I was able to get out to a quiet place yesterday and meditate on these things: "Whyyyyyy God do we have to have winter? "  (Can you hear the childish exasperation in my voice?)
                        

Kansas City Winter Scene

                       As I viewed the panoramic tree line and gray overcast sky, I realized we have to let winter have it's way.  

                       What is the purpose of the winter season? 

     Winter provides a dormancy; a rest from the busyness of producing leaves and fruit.  A great internal work is being done that cannot be viewed externally.  But, the leaves are gone.  The fruit can't be produced, no matter what you do.  Even the color is washed out of the vegetation.  


      Have you ever felt like this?  No matter how hard you try, nothing externally wonderful is coming forth?  Your color is gone; the things you once found joy in are no longer a source of strength?  You might be in a winter season.  

      To the ordinary eye, it can seem like a time of death and dying.  But this is NOT true at all!  Something marvelous and purposeful is actually happening underneath the surface, in the internal structure of trees and plants.  And something wonderful might be happening in you!

Josiah, 3 years old, Kansas City, MO

         So often during this season we can get focused on all that's missing on the outside:  Outward success, financial gain, better production and maybe lack of His felt presence.  Instead, I wonder if we probed the Holy Spirit about what HE was doing IN us, we might gain a better understanding about what is happening outwardly?  

           For us, winter can be a time of drawing nearer to the fire of God's heart to find our source of warmth.  Its there, in the heat of His love, we realize our worth doesn't come from what we produce but from being His child.  We can let our roots reach deep and draw from the Water of His Word for our sustenance.  We can ask Him what changes or pruning need to be done while the cold winds blow.   If we surrender, we will see the wisdom of His ways.  

     Winter can be a time of great internal workings if we let it be.  Or we can choose the other option which will get us no where.  We can get frustrated that our dreams seem buried and our heart's desires not being fulfilled.  We can miss the whole purpose of our lack of production.  Or we can see under the surface and utilize it for The Kingdom's  richest gain.  

             See, the fruit we ultimately produce must be WORTHY.  It must be pure and truly life giving.  It can't just be weak, small, diseased and inedible.  It must come from a strong branch.  Good fruit has to come from a strong foundation.  A strong source.  And this strength only comes through the grip of winter and realizing HE is the ONE who produces this kind of fruit.  Not us.  Only the trees and branches that have felt the chill of winter and cooperated with it's force will produce worthy fruit when the Spring comes.  And it will come.  He is True.  His Word doesn't fail.  And all His promises are Yes and Amen. The Spring season will come again.  

Spring green!  Kansas City, MO

Flower, Butchart Gardens, Victoria, B.C.

Baby bird on our back deck Kansas City, MO

Woman, You are Strong: Strength Defined

                             Yesterday was a day to celebrate women.  I was honored by this.  Clearly, around the world the mistreatment and attack on women is very real.  Growing up in this culture, America, I experienced something maybe entirely different then most women who live in severely male dominated cultures experience every day.

                          As a child, I was privileged to be told I could do anything, be anything and that there wasn't anything I couldn't do.  I believed it.

                       Growing up I had aspirations of becoming a lawyer, a businesswoman, a marine biologist and news anchorwoman.

                         I was going to take on the world . . . and win.

                       I still believe this, that nothing is impossible for me.  But my definition of strength and being a strong woman has changed for me over the years.


                       That mouthy little girl who could argue her way out of every corner was about to get a wake up call.  Someone was about to redefine the word STRONG for me.  No longer would  quick-witted come backs and smart-mouth monologues littered with trash talk count towards my credit.  To explain, I met a man who embodied more strength and resolve than I could ever possess on a good day.  But His strength was reigned in.  His strength was immovable, like a freight train set on course that no one, not even His own weakness (if that were possible) could derail.   He wouldn't even argue or raise his voice and yet His authority when He spoke caused thousands to sit silent, hanging on every word he uttered.

                             The Gospel completely messes with us.  When Jesus came He one-upped everyone a thousand times over.  He raised the bar.  For me, what I considered strong, He considered weak.  Whaaa?  I will repeat:

                        What I considered STRENGTH, He actually considered WEAKNESS.

                         This is because He didn't just have strength, like me . . .  a wild, unharnessed beastly aggression towards those who disagreed with me.  But He possessed meekness. . . something entirely different.  He has 550 volts of strength running through his core, along with massive resolve and ability to turn off the switch.  He has ALL the strength coupled with the ability to harness that strength.

                          Because He was fully God~the One who just spoke and the cosmos was created, the One who just touched and people were completely healed, the One who just uttered a few words and humans were released of demons~He has ALL power.  And yet, He has ALL self-control.  He allowed Himself to be beaten to a pulp and nailed to a cross .  He utilized this GOD-sized self control and allowed men, the very ones he created, to mock him, beat him and nail Him to a tree without one ounce of fight, grit or resistance.  He even said, "I could've released 12 legions of angels . . ."  But He didn't.  He knew the capacity of authority He had to control the situation, and yet He gave it up and trusted Himself to His Father.  He had complete meekness.  Completed with trust in His Father.  Complete strength, but  under complete control.

                         That wasn't all.  Many tried to "launch him into ministry" before it was time.  They saw the miracles, the power, the crowds drawn to Him like moths to a flame.  They saw the potential of His platform.  But He wasn't having it.  He wasn't relying on human will to make him popular.  He didn't need the praise, accolade or acknowledgement of the world to boost his ego.  Because He had none.  He had the strength, but He possessed the self-control to match that Super-sized strength.  He knew there was a time for Him to be lifted up and exalted.  He trusted the Father for that moment, not the voices of those surrounding him.  

               But many of us have been wounded.  Trusting anyone is difficult.  We have had to fight for everything it feels like sometimes.  But, trust is what is at the heart of meekness.  Jesus gave control to One greater than Him.  

              How on earth do we trust again once that trust has been assaulted?  How do we give up control again when we feel the rug has been pulled out from under us?  
   
               Jesus said, "Take my yoke upon you.  Learn of me, for I am gentle and humble (or meek) of heart."  Matthew 11:29

               He's entirely different from anyone else.  He is always gentle, all the time.  He's 100% trustworthy, able to turn around even the worst situations. He's always faithful, even when we are faithless.   He always has our BEST interest in mind, even when it doesn't feel like it.  He is humble, not accusing us and completely patient, even in our failings.  We can trust Him.  We can learn to trust again.  We CAN have a strength rooted in trust.  We CAN have a strength rooted in meekness.

                I still consider myself a "strong woman".   But my goals are a little bit different.  Okay, my goals to become an even stronger woman are A LOT different.  I want to lean into the One who can harness this powerful gift of strength.  He not only has given it to me, but to all women.  And yet without Him, I think we missing the boat.

                       We need His meekness, not just raw girl power.  We need His resolve to walk in gentleness, not just wild aggression.  We need His ability to perceive His timing, not just use our strength to exalt ourselves.

                        We are women.  We are moms.  We are businesswomen.  We are daughters.  We are grandmothers.  We are lawyers.  We are writers and marine biologists and everything in between.  But we are also carriers of His meekness, a rare form of strength that our world desperately needs.




TO BE CLEAR                          
*** In NO way am I promoting abuse or relating the abuse that Jesus suffered on our behalf to suffering abuse in relationships.  What Jesus suffered He did for us, as a specific act obedience from the Father.  Abuse in relationships should not be tolerated in any way, shape or form.  Abuse should not be the manner of any relationship and should be condemned in every way.  Healthy boundaries should always be drawn in these type of situations with the help and support of outside resources.                            

                       

For All the Broken Ones . . .

                    "Mommy, Mommy, its my turn to go with you!"  Olivia urgently reminds me.  We have started taking turns when we go to the beach.  One on one time with our children has become harder and harder to pull off these days.  They have figured out if they get up early enough we can more easily squeeze in a "date".    Josiah had already been beach combing earlier with Dad.  And now it was Olivia's turn.

                    So, we walk.  We gaze.  We let the morning sun warm our cheeks and feel the morning breeze chill our legs.  Fishermen are already out with a trusty herron or two alongside to cherry pick from their catch.  And we are searching.

                       "Ooooh, look at this one!  It looks like a heart!"  Olivia squeals with delight.

                       "Its broken though.  Try to look for the ones without the holes."  I reply, teaching her from years of experience in the craft of shell searching.

                       "But I like it." Olivia responds with disappointment.

                       Okay, you can't argue with that, can you?

                        "Okay put it in your bag." I reply.


              Over and over again, she is drawn to the broken ones.  I patiently point out the flaws and she tells me about the beautiful eye-popping colors and the redemptive new shape she sees formed by broken edges.   And I realize its much like God with us.  We can't impress Him with our flawlessness.  He is drawn to our broken edges. He takes delight in our unique bold colors and non-uniform shapes. He isn't afraid of our brokenness, but rather drawn to it.  He dwells with the broken and brings redemption to our flaws (Psalm 51:17).  He takes what another calls broken and calls it beautiful, just like Olivia was doing this morning with her tiny treasures.

             
                          The sea is calm today.  I remember the Sea of Glass that The Good Book says surrounds His Throne.  It stretches for miles, and I try to picture a Man in the middle and multitudes leaning in for a glance.

                 A thought stirs inside that forms a knot in my throat and causes my eyes to water.  Not only does He know the grains of sand on the seashore-every single one.  But, He also knows the shells, every single one.  Every single flawless one.  Every single broken one.  Even every single shell my Olivia would find today.  He knows it all.  He is God over the vast, endless spaces and God over the broken, tiny particles of sand.  He is God over the countless miles of horizon and He knows each brightly colored  shell along our path.   This One, He is unsearchable, and yet He has invited us to search Him out.